What do you want from life after work?

“To be old and wise, you must first be young and foolish,” so the saying goes.

One aspect of being old and wise is reaching the day when we finally hang up our briefcase, toolbox, or wellington boots, fully prepared for a happy and contented retirement. For many this signifies the moment of relief when, for the first time ever, we have ample time to travel the world, take up new hobbies, and scratch whatever itch we’ve been ignoring. 

For many other people however, retirement can leave them feeling lost.

Naturally people worry about having enough money for this period in life. But there’s more to it than that. When you think about it, it’s understandable; retirement for many entails a leap of faith after decades of routine. You’re not simply at work Friday, doing your job, and retired Monday, dancing for joy. Retirement is a major transition.

We must also arrive at that point having prepared mentally and, you could almost say, philosophically.

Preparing for retirement mentally

Meet Andy. 

Andy is, like me, in his mid-50s and has been at work a long time, nearly 40 years already.

Andy has of course cracked working life: 40 years means a lot of shortcuts learned, the right words to say, the right things to do, when not to do anything. And Andy is well paid for it. But honestly, he finds it rather boring. At the moment, he’s finding it particularly hard to remain motivated, as, in effect, he’s serving a long, long notice period in his head, before he retires.

He, like many people, is worried that his cash reserves may not stretch to cover what could easily be a 30-year retirement with a lifestyle to maintain – the average longevity for men these days is 79 (for women it’s 83). My clients typically live longer than the average, of course, having eaten well and taken care of themselves. To put it another way, many of us face a retirement that could be as long as our working life! So Andy keeps working, sort of.

But is that what he’s really worried about? Is money the reason he’s still working?

I think what he was really worried about was keeping motivated, being interested in something, feeling valued, and having a purpose. That is what he feels he’s lost in his current role and he doesn’t want to feel like that in retirement either .

The prospect of retirement does not need to be so fraught with uncertainty

Now meet Bill and Claire, who have the countdown to their retirement pencilled in on their kitchen calendar. As they turn over a new month, the number reduces. A time of celebration on the first of every month. They have 40 months to go but have a positive attitude to their transition to being work-free in 2025.

They are not particularly more financially secure than Andy; they simply see it in a different way. They’re actively planning for a brand new future, knowing that they too have enough money not to have to work ever again, so they’re not thinking about work, but about what will replace it. And that’s social interaction, golf lessons and tennis tournaments at their local club, when time allows to fill the days between lunches with friends and weekends away.

They realise that there’s more than money to retirement, there is this all-important need to feel you are part of something and to have a purpose.

How to prepare for retirement emotionally

The pandemic has given us a chance to analyse what we need to be happy – some people will have noticed more acutely that they need to be in the company of others. Others will have realised they don’t need social interaction as much as they thought! 

Some people in work realised how important it is for them to be part of a team, motivating and being motivated by colleagues. Others will have noticed how much more they can get done without the chitchat!

It’s useful to observe these things in the last stage before retirement, so you can figure out a way to translate that into something else once you’ve retired, so it’s not suddenly a huge gap in your life that you don’t even know how to fill.

Once we identify exactly what ‘makes us tick’ in our working life, we can plan ahead to replicate those situations after we retire. This ensures that we do not suddenly fall into a gaping hole.

This does not always relate to the workplace itself

Some people savour the private time of their commute. I’ve heard of one lady who, on her way home, would call in to the local pub with a book and a glass of wine, for some peace and tranquillity alone before returning to the family. 

We are all different, but in some ways, we have common interests and desires, and we need to find ways to continue these when we retire.

Timing your retirement is also crucial – as in a film recommended to me lately about a pilgrimage, entitled The Way. One female character in a film was asked if she had ever walked ‘el camino’, and she replied “no – when I was young I was too busy; now that I’m old I am too tired.” This struck a huge chord with me: it’s so important to make sure that you take the time to enjoy your hard-earned money while you’re still fit and healthy enough to do so. 

There’s a trick to this: to find the sweet spot between working hard to achieve enough to enjoy life and becoming too old to do it all! It’s too easy to keep pounding the treadmill and miss that moment, but it’s so important to stop and recognise the point when you’ve reached it. 

In many ways that’s what I’m here to help you with.

Money in itself is simply dots on a screen, or coloured pieces of paper. A medium of exchange, my economics teacher told us. Exactly! It’s when we use it to buy comfort and happiness, or for the good of others, that it takes on meaning. 

What do you want from life after work? I can bet you it’s more than money.

Give me a ring and I can help you create a retirement that creates purpose and fulfilment as well as financial stability.